27 May Mind, Body & Spirit Expo 2025 – How was it?
So, this adventure is behind us now. I surrendered to the unknown just to find out what would happen if doing what no Family Constellation Facilitator had done before by spreading the word about the Systemic Family Constellation Therapy at the prestigious exhibition.
Why, when and how?
When we were setting up the stand, my wife asked me: “When did you book the place, and what made you do that?” This was a friendly/curious question, which I found impossible to answer, as I do not recall the booking process or when the decision was made. It’s like someone else did it for me. The same power that has guided me throughout my constellation journey: not remembering when and why I booked 4 years of facilitator training, or why I had signed the lease of premium premises at Canary Wharf that support that work. I have learned to notice that this amnesia has its own place, which I honour. What is important is the outcome, not the start.
The Set Up
When the stand was set up on Friday, it melted our hearts. It was just like the tiny part of our practice that immigrated into the vast space of the London Olympia. So I sat there, trying to avoid the eye contact of the passers-by, focusing on reading some constellation-themed books. I did so to prevent the hard-selling approach, which I experienced with some of the other exhibitors. It was a simple strategy: if you are interested, then come and ask; otherwise, enjoy the rest of the show. By the end of Friday, I started to feel pretty deflated, as the show did not have many visitors, and the lack of interest in our stand made me feel that it was a mistake coming there. I did not take it personally, though, as I witnessed the famous bookshop’s stand next to us, having 4 staff members scrolling their phones, as there was no one to serve. So it meant it was not only us.
The following days
After the deflated start, the sun had come out, and the darkness had passed. All the way from Saturday morning until the closing time of Monday, I had spoken to over a hundred people. Explaining to those who know about the work, in a more detailed way, what we do, and also accepting all the rolling eyes of those who do not know anything about the constellation work and presume it is some sort of voodoo practice. Well, well, not all will get it, and that is also fine. What really made my heart skip a beat were my previous clients and some partners or friends of theirs, who sat down and shared feedback about how things had been for them since the session. I realised that I usually don’t get this feedback, so it was a true privilege. After hearing how people’s lives have been changed so significantly, I remembered why I am doing this work and how privileged I am to be the middleman between the field and a client.
The safe and calm space
Another phenomenon that I noticed was that children sought shelter in our stand from all the overwhelming sensory experiences happening in the show. They came and sat next to me and didn’t want to leave. I encouraged their parents to take their seats as well and spend some time in our space. One of the sweetest 14-year-old girls who had Down syndrome and the most polite manners ever, stayed with me for over half an hour when her mother felt that she was in safe hands with me and went to look around at the show. This all demonstrated to me that the field we’re lucky to be part of through any constellation was there with us on those days.
Thank you
If you are one of those people who reached out to me at the show and are now reading this blog, I want to thank you for your curiosity. As all my conversations were deeply meaningful (apart from that lady who told me that instead of therapy work, I should be spreading the word of Jesus, and as I don’t do that, I’ll be burning in hell:), I know it was my pleasure talking with you too. As for anyone else, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you need to know more about this work, or if you are sitting with anything else.
Remember, as always, you are the most important person in your life. Be kind to yourself so everyone around you can benefit, too.
With all my love,
Ivo
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